You know the type... Sitting in the bleachers watching practice...everyday. Talking to their kids from the stands, telling them what to do, how to play. Trying to get just a "minute" in the coach's office. You happen to be in the front office checking your box and you see them, hovering, waiting to talk to anyone that will listen to them. It seems that they must not have employment because every time you look up you see them. Then it happens...their child gets an injury.
As a young professional, what do you plan to do when the "helicopter parent" comes in for a landing in your training room? If you think it will not happen...just wait...It will happen to you one day.
When I first started, I would become very defensive with these parents. I did not know how to handle them. I would let them get under my skin and wonder if I really was doing what I was supposed to be doing. They second guessed me and eventually I started to second guess myself. Don't let that happen to you.
- Be confident in what you are doing in the training room. Confidence in yourself and your treatments/rehab or a lack of confidence in those areas will show. If people think that you are unsure of what you are doing, they will second guess everything you do.
- Be able to explain the 'whats' and 'whys' of what you are doing. Telling a kid or a parent that you want this done a certain way just because you said may not be the best way to build their confidence in you. Be prepared to educate them, these are teachable moments, and you should take advantage of them.
- Have a plan. If you can show them rehab programs, treatment plans, return to play guidelines, they will see that you know what you are doing.
- Be patient. These parents have a difficult time with letting their children deal with their own issues. Listen to them, but stand your ground. Once they see that you are a professional and you are taking care of their child, they will be less apprehensive in future encounters.
Helicopter parents are usually well-meaning parents that need to learn their boundaries. With a little practice you will learn how to clear them for a landing and get them back in the sky without raising your stress levels.
3 comments:
I dealt with these parents a lot in my first job. It was frustrating and challenging. The other extreme is what I deal with more now...satellite parents-those that are so out of touch that you can barely make contact.
These types of parents are equally difficult because you can't make decisions without them. Trying to notify them of anything is impossible when half of their numbers don't work or there is a language barrier.
I'm sure there is a happy medium, but I haven't yet found it.
Jeff, I like your post and think you're giving great advice. The ATHLETIC (wink wink) training room is our domain and we are to be respectful, considerate and confident masters of it.
I am working on a position as an athletic trainer with the teamSmith softball, a club softball organization headed up by two friends of mine. Last night, I went to their "kick-off meeting" and these friends asked me to speak to the athletes and their parents about nutrition and injury prevention. Before the meeting started, one friend, Terry, had everyone in the room close their eyes. She then said "Okay. With your eyes closed, point at the person in this room that you think has the most softball experience." Well, Terri has a very impressive coaching resume, and Julie, my other friend, is an olympic gold medalist from the 1996 softball team and I've heard Terri call her the fastest player to play softball, and Dot Richardson call her the best second basemen of all time or something like that. Needless to say, most people pointed at these two women. Some parents were of course delusional enough to point elsewhere. These, I believe, are the Satellite parents Carissa speaks of.
After they had all pointed, Terri had them open their eyes and said "okay, you all pointed at us so remember that and when we're coaching, be quiet." She continued by explaining that the parents need to have faith in the coaches and their knowledge, and their ability to do their jobs because they are truly the experts.
This post made me think of this little exercise, and I wonder what would happen if we tried something like this with parents... "Point at the person in this room who is a medical professional trained to prevent, assess, diagnose, and treat athletic injuries." You get the idea. This probably wouldn't work to get us respected as medical professionals but it sure is tempting!!
Not to rain on anyone's parade because I enjoyed all the comments but this doesn't stop at the high school level. We still hear from the parents' of our college students (and I mean, we, as the educational program). I firmly believe that the same tactics apply to all settings. The most important thing, I think, is to be confident in the decision you make. Good luck with all those landings!
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